I do not want to share anything or anyone belonging to me.
I know I am possessive and it is can be an distinctive trait of people under the Scorpio star (though I am not completely into this type of thing anymore). But I can say that, I am extremely possessive. I want to remove this negative character of myself. I-can-not-do-it.
Sadly but true.
I would rather be alone than to be with someone else and then I was left all alone.
Recently, I am addicted in buying cross-body bags from the common brand name such as Colette by Hayman to Nine West and upper-class such as Oroton (the levels of the brands are perceived from my point of view only, it will vary to different people). I spent too much money to them, I gradually become someone I hate the most: shopaholic. I am in the state of wanting to show that I am not poor and I can take care of myself. Such a hopeless myself.
I am moving out of my aunty’s house after nearly 2 years staying with her and her family. I was so eager to depart with all the preparation and organized stuff. From the moment she asked me to move, I was looking for everywhere with both depression and eagerness. My standard for a room shifted from renting a house with 4 people for 2 bedrooms and 1 bathroom to 2 people sharing a room with an ensuite bathroom. Finally I found one by luck, sharing with a friend who is my colleague and we study in the same school as well.
Tonight, 10072017 is the first night I am officially out of my family’s reach, officially living without them.
Tonight I feel sad and alone.
Tonight I want to cry but I can not let my mother know.